Miss Marple has it right

For those not familiar with Agatha Christie's Miss Marple, she often solves mysteries because the killer/thief/perpetrator reminds her of someone in her small town. I recently realized that I keep meeting the same people just in different bodies. Given a group congregating for a random or even common purpose, there are certain types who seem to always be present.

This adventure into group analysis happened a couple of weeks ago when I spent a few days with thirteen people whom I didn't know. We were a random group collected for a brief common purpose. In our introductions activity I was struck by the fact that one woman looked so much like someone I know. Later that evening when she also acted like my acquaintance, it actually got creepy. Seriously, she was a dobbelganger in both looks and affectations. In this group, she was the Caretaker. Then there was the Earth Mother, a comfortable woman with great common sense and a knowledge of how to teach important lessons. The Pain in the Ass was loud, long winded and not self aware, although I'm sure others had pointed out his faults throughout his adulthood and their helpful hints were ignored. The Frightened Mouse actually got along with the PITA, whom several of us decided was simply lonely.

The Wait To See How The Wind Is Blowing pair pretty much stuck together while The Professor got along with everyone. Mostly we left The Full Steam Ahead alone which was fine because she didn't seem to care. She Got A Pickle And I Didn't and Easygoing did ok together, particularly if the Peacemaker was around. The One-Up bustled between sets of the others and the Naysayer ended several conversations.

Stereotypes, dislike them though we may, exist for a reason, which is that on the surface they are accurate. Every group has a certain combination of the above, plus a few more, including the Follow the Leader, the Wanna Be and the Pleaser. One prejudice I am conscious of having myself is against those individuals who perpetuate a stereotype by being so like it, such as when I run across a Dumb Blonde. I want to shake the person into something else. And here I was with a whole group of obvious stereotypes.

It was when I wondered how the rest of the group was pegging me that I finally got to the next layer of the onion. I realized that actually there are bits and pieces of many of the stereotypes I've listed above in me, well, in each of us really, if we choose to let them out. Those characteristics are just under the surface. I can Caretake, Placate, Naysay and One-Up with the best of them. So, as I continued down that road of self realization, peeling away to a deeper layer, I understood it is often those bits and pieces about myself that I have tried to work on because I find them annoying that is a common denominator. Now isn't that a PITA? Wonder if Miss Marple ever figured that out.

Marilyn