The Evolution of Patriotism

The last Saturday of May our youth group would make our annual trip to Letchworth State Park, leaving early in the morning and coming home after dark.  Once everyone was on board, Mr. Timby, a very patient bus driver, would pull out of the church parking lot, listen to the chatter of 30 teenagers, and occasionally join in our songs during the hour and a half ride from Buffalo to the ‘Grand Canyon of the East.’  At our picnic area there were mandatory organized games and then choices of softball, swimming, or hiking.  I usually came home tired and with my first sunburn of the summer.

That was tradition, unless the last Saturday was May 30^th.  Then our outing shifted dates as we paused to honor those who died in service to our country, for that was before Decoration Day became Memorial Day.  Also back then, Washington and Lincoln each had their own birthdays, November 11^th was Armistice, not Veteran’s Day to mark the beginning of peace after World War I, and all holidays fell on an actual date, not the forced creation of a 3-day weekend.  Oh, and stores were closed, not running special sales.

Patriotism has taken several forms in my lifetime.  In school there was the daily Pledge of Allegiance and hands went over hearts.  At parades, we stood as elder veterans marched by.  Things changed with Vietnam when so many of us were angry. I remember a discussion with some of my parent’s friends who were accusing protestors of being unpatriotic.  They had a hard time believing that we still got chills hearing the Star Spangled Banner while demanding equality for all or accusing leaders of being wrong. With Watergate we got disillusioned, with the slowness of reform we became apathetic.  We had to learn how to balance idealism with reality, try on materialism, and deal with diapers, glass ceilings, commutes, a shrinking world, and rapid change.  We saw the elimination of the draft and luckily we matured to separating the war from the warrior.  We had to learn the truth of what Calvin Coolidge said: “Patriotism is easy to understand in America - it means looking out for yourself by looking out for your country.”  I wish more of our elected officials would take that to heart.

On this holiday weekend I will agree with Sinclair Lewis, “Intellectually I know that America is no better than any other country; emotionally I know she is better than every other country.”

Happy Holiday,

Marilyn

 

Special Effects

One of my favorite generational stories comes from years ago when my family visited for Thanksgiving and we went to the circus.  Five year old Tiffany was sitting on my lap as the performers made their entrance and paraded around the ring in the United Center.  As we watched elephants, horses, acrobats, and clowns, she looked at me and said, “Those are great special effects!”  It took a lot of convincing to help her understand that everything from the woman on the trapeze to the dancing bear was real. She sat enthralled for the next hour.

I saw Star Trek over the weekend and thought about how the mechanics of special effects has blossomed in my lifetime.  The first Star Trek series, or I Dream of Jeannie, or Bewitched were based on fantasy that was both fun but obvious. 

Today’s vampire, fairy tale, or even The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe stories coming to life on screen are sophisticated, enthralling, and more believable.  We’ve become so used to the spectacular in our entertainment that those stories that are probably the most challenging scenes to produce, direct, or film are those that are quiet and plain. 

Yesterday was Pentecost, a day in Christianity marking when the Holy Spirit arrived.  People standing next to each other suddenly started speaking in different languages. Believers could now share their story with others.  Part of the Spirit’s job is to connect us and what better way than through the ability to communicate? 

In today’s troubled world we need a connector more than ever.  We communicate frequently and globally, yet language remains a gr8 divider.  While there have always been barriers, it seems that even as we communicate more, the gaps in our ability to understand are increasing.  I’ve come to think that the greatest gift we might offer someone as we communicate is to engage in a dialogue where what we do is listen.  Truly listen to what is being said underneath all of the hoopla, codes, rants, capital letters, or even what is being said in the silence.  Like Spock, let’s have ears that are a special effect.

Marilyn

We've All Got Issues

We’re familiar with the concept of recovering alcoholic but I recently read an author who called himself a recovering fundamentalist.  It made me smile.  Well, it was a sad smile, for I deeply understood what he meant.  It’s about growing up with a god who, like Santa, keeps track of naughty or nice, but where the consequences of naughty are much more than coal in your stocking.  And, no matter how hard you try, it’s about never being able to measure up to the expected good, for it’s a world where there is no concept of grace.  It’s a world where religion and denomination matter more than social justice or even spirituality.

As I reflected on adolescent years that enabled me to identify with that poignant recovering fundamentalist phrase, I decided to call myself a recovering child instead. 

Most of us still bear some scars from our childhood.  Many were bullied or were outcasts.  Some never believed they really belonged to the in-crowd even though they sat at the cool lunch table.  Others were ashamed of things at home, or… well, the list is endless as to what baggage we still cart around. 

I feel much more like a child now than I did at age 8 or 10 or 14.  And that’s generally a good thing.

But one area of my life where I struggle as a recovering child is in the realm of faith, which was where this musing all began.  When one grows up engrossed in the church, when one can recite the books of the Bible and all the best stories in each book, I have found it hard to approach those stories with fresh childlike eyes to see how it can apply to me today.  OK, Daniel survived the lion’s den and I’ve survived some of my own demons. 

Over the years I’ve given myself permission to examine a doctrine that I once accepted at face value and ask ‘what do I believe today?’  It’s been liberating to discover grey with a bit of ‘and’ instead of living a black/white/either/or life.  There can be creation and evolution; belief and doubt can co-exist. 

We’ve all got issues.  Whatever yours may be – spirituality, self-esteem, a fear of math or making a mistake, perhaps if you’re gentle with yourself and provide a new label, you may find it helps.  Now when I read the comics or ignore my chores I can shrug and say it’s because I’m a recovering child.

See ya later alligator,

Marilyn

The Things We Don't Know

Why is it that I may know one thing but feel another?  And that my actions may be contrary to both the knowing and the feeling?

Why does a 60° day in the spring make me take my sweater off and when it’s 60° in the fall, I put one on? 

It’s these daily conundrums that can frustrate or merely be an interesting conversation starter.  Why does watching bears using toilet paper make some people want to buy that brand?

Part of the problem with these types of issues is that there may not be an answer, or the answer is too complex, or too hard.  I mean, you know the technology has to exist to make a brand of pantyhose that doesn’t run, so why don’t they make some?  Experts might say that profits would go down. I would bet against that, but then what do I know?

I’ll bet you’ve mused on some similar queries and I’d be interested in knowing what they are.  After all, by putting our heads together we may discover there are some things we actually do know.  Or, at least we’ll enjoy the discussions.

Marilyn